what should I do (next)?

I could hardly sleep for the last several nights.  I am under stressed now.  No, you won't see it on my face nor on my daily acts. I am an expert in hiding my true feelings.  I have thousand things running on my head and it never stop even when I really wish thel to stop, simply to get a bit of rest. 

One question, what should I do next?

It's end of October now, which means I am so close to the deadline to make decision for my life.  Do I sound like exaggerattingsimple thing? It's a big thing for me. I am not a person who can enjoy her life without making any progress to get closer to start stepping on the future. 

Some options available:

a. go home, start up my career in business development with lowest salary ever, and say au revoir to France and Europe

b. stay in France and not knowing if I can find a good internship, I mean, the one in the business development field, as I always want

c. start my own event organizer business in my hometown

d. find a job based on the salary with no interest at all

Okay, options a and b are running my head without a break. I hate being in a situation that I don't even know where I will be in the next two months.  Option c is my other dream that I might do it if I decided to live with my parents. and option d, ahh forget it. That's the last thing I will do in my 25-year-old age.

It does not seem like I will find my answer anytime soon. Writing helps me a lot to relieve my pain and random debates on my head. I am writing not to complain and let people read my pain. As i said, this is a memory that I have ever been in such situation that will make me stronger the next time I reread it. 

Anw, there is a multinational company who offered me a very good intership in Indonesia by the beginning of this year, and again now. I don't know how to respond. There are part of me who wants to stay in France for a bit longer, other wants to start my career soon back home.

Taking chances is rarely about overcoming your fears. The truth is everytime you take a big risk in your life, no matter how it ends up, you are always glad you took it. - annonymous-