Un jour - La Statue de la Liberté

La Statue de la Liberté - Paris

Musée d'Orsay

p.s.:

Un jour, je serai à New York et aurai la même photo en face de la statue de la liberté réel là!

back after 4.5 years

It was 22 February when I finally went back to the church I once visited with Jun and Sari 4.5 years ago after Taizé. I don’t remember the name of the church but I can’t forget how glowing and shiny the altar was. It was so glamour for me at that time, but yes it left some marks in my memory.

Then I remembered about this church, so I went there for a Saturday mass with Rian, as at that time he was here for short travelling. It was full, and still with its beautiful, shiny and glowing altar.  There is a story about this chapel that makes it so special. Once Virgin Mary appeared in front of Saint Catherine Labouré in 1830 and requested the creation of the medal which came to be known as the Miraculous Medal.

The mass was meaningful that afternoon, remembering that I finally got the chance to be back to the place I have never thought before.  Old memories came back to my mind and I remembered that I prayed and asked to be given another chance to be back to that church again. And yes, Virgin Mary, Jesus and God gave me the chance. It’s another slide added to my life in faith. It’s also another prove to myself that ‘you’ll never know how things will turn out’ ‘keep on praying and dreaming cause they do come true’.

p.s.: It’s actually not a church, but a chapel called Chapelle Notre-Dame de la médaille miraculeuse

a very nice weekend with an old friend

My sony xperia L

I went to carrefour yesterday night before soirée in Hang's place with Sanja. I don't know how it happened but then I lost my mobile phone. I was still checking the metro map while waiting in the cashier, but then I put all the bottles into the bag and I think I put my mobile just there in that cashier table. I was so panic when I realized about it in the metro station, and then I hurriedly run back and it was gone already.

So i lost my 4-month old mobile phone with all its photos and videos that I made on my very last day in the university. I hate myself really, for being so careless. I feel really bad not because of the price of the phone, but because of my situation now. I am not having a lot of money for these several months living in Paris, and this happens just at the same time when I really have to tighten my belt. And last night I could not sleep because I remembered, my dad was giving me the money amounting half of the price of the phone. I remembered I didn't want to receive his money but he insisted and said that I can buy the phone that I like, and he could give more money for that. He is not a billionaire, I have to highlight, but he is the best dad.   Several years ago, he was also the one giving me the money for buying the electronic dictionary that I no longer use now.
I feel so bad that I cannot take a good care of it and wasted my dad's money just like that. He even only has a very old-school nokia phone that my mom bought 8/9 years ago.  I feel very guilty for being so irresponsible to this simple thing.

I know people are saying that it's just a material thing and shit happens sometimes. Buy yeah, for me, it's more about this guilty feeling to my parents for wasting their money for being so irresponsible. This is a lesson learned for me, the guilty feeling is the worst than anything else.
I'm spending all my savings now for doing things I want to do. Soon, I'll earn much more than I spend now and to share it with my dad and mom.

L'année du Cheval

Doa tiga Salam Maria

Sekitar bulan Oktober-November tahun lalu, gue sudah hampir memutuskan utk pulang ke Indonesia and magang/kerja disana. Gue begitu ga yakin kalau gue bisa mendapatkan kesempatan magang di Paris, karena level bahasa Prancis gue yang gue rasa ga cukup dan juga pengalaman kerja di bidang yang gue mau sangat minim. Gue uda mulai daftar di perusahaan besar di Jakarta dan KL, dan mulai tanya2 teman ttg lowongan magang di kantor mereka. Bahkan mama papa dengan senang hati menyambut gue kalau gue pulang kapanpun itu.

Tapi suatu hari gue memutuskan bahwa gue akan berusaha sekuat tenaga utk bisa dapat kesempatan magang disini. Kenapa? Pertama, ini kesempatan terakhir gue utk belajar segala hal dari negara ini dan orang2nya. Kedua, gue masih mau membuktikan ke diri gue sendiri, sejauh mana kemampuan gue utk bertahan hidup tanpa 'kembali ke kandang'. Lalu faktor lainnya, gue masih pengen ada di Prancis, gue mau Tommy bisa datang pas summer dan kita bisa jalan2 bareng, gue mau Tommy jg punya kesempatan utk belajar banyak dari negri yang sangat beda dari Indo ini.  Gue masih mau ke London, Spanyol dan Roma juga.  Kalaupun orang2 mulai menyindir gue bahwa gue uda umur 25 tapi masih blm pnya kerjaan tetap, dll., gue meyakinkan diri gue, bahwa gue masih akan punya 100 tahun kedepan, dan 2 tahun hanyalah jangka waktu pendek yang gue habiskan utk belajar banyak hal bagi kepribadian gue kedepannya.

Masa2 ngelamar magang bukan masa yang mudah. Setiap gue mengirim aplikasi, gue jg harus siap ditolak atau diajak interview mendadak pake bahasa prancis. Dapat kesempatan magang disini memang susah, karena semua anak kuliah diwajibkan magang sehingga perusahaan bisa memilih dengan leluasa kandidat mereka. 

So, setelah g memutuskan utk bertahan dinegri ini, gue benar2 berusaha. Gue update cv gue, motivation letter, nongkrongin situs ngelamar magang tiap malem, latihan interview pake bahasa prancis, dan gue ga lupa utk berdoa. 

Gue berkomitmen utk doa tiga Salam Maria karena gue percaya bahwa Allah Bapa melalui Yesus dan Bunda Maria akan mengabulkan permohonan gue. Gue berdoa agar diberi kesempatan magang di Prancis. Tapi gue tetap menutup setiap doa dengan permohonan agar apa yang diberikan kepada gue adalah yang terbaik bagi masa depan gue, baik itu magang disini, maupun kerja di Indo. Gue percaya kalau apapun yang akan diberikan kepada gue, itu adalah jalan yang terbaik bagi gue. Gue jg berjanji bahwa jikalau suatu hari akan ada masa2 sulit dalam masa magang gue di prancis, gue ga akan mengeluh, karena itu adalah pilihan gue. Gue benar2 pasa masa berusaha dan berser. Akhirnya gue mengerti apa maksud kata2 'berusaha dan berserah diri'. 

Permohonan gue dikabulkan oleh bunda Maria. Bahkan gue dapat 2 kesempatan magang dari 2 perusahaan berbeda dan 1 lowongan kerja di Indonesia. Plus, setelah beberapa saat, gue jg uda bisa dapat tempat tinggal pasti di Paris yang super susah utk cari tmp tinggal ini. Gue merasa begitu diberkati dan dipercaya oleh Tuhan utk menjalani hidup gue dengan baik dan sebaik-baiknya agar gak ada penyesalan di masa mendatang. Tuhan begitu baik sama gue dan gue sangat bersyukur karenanya. 

Gue biasanya gak pernah membicarakan tentang iman kepercayaan maupun agama dengan orang lain. Gue adalah pendengar yang baik karena gue merasa gue bisa jadi domba yang baik tapi bukan gembala yang sebenarnya. Gue nulis di blog, yang gada yang baca ini, karena gue mau ketika suatu hari iman gue mulai goyah, gue akan kembali baca blog ini dan mengingat betapa ketika gue percaya, berusaha dan berserah, maka engkau akan diberikan yang terbaik. 

Jika memang suatu hari kamu tanpa sengaja membaca blog ini, gue harap ini bisa jadi sedikit bantuan bagimu agar kiranya kamu makin percaya akan kekuatan doa tiga Salam Maria dan kepada Allah Bapa. 

Terima kasih Bunda atas terkabulnya doa tiga Salam Maria. Aku percaya bahwa setiap moment di dalam hidupku, adalah alasan di balik lapisan imanku.

Je vous salue Marie, pleine de grâce

Le Seigneur est avec vous

Vous êtes bénie entre toutes les femmes

Et Jesus, le fruit des vos entrailles, est béni

Sainte Marie, mère du Dieu

Priez pour nous, pauvres pêcheurs

Maintenant et à l'heure de notre mort

Amen 

Unexpectable January

WOW. I am also surprised at how many things have happened in this month. By new year, i was still in Strasbourg, enjoying the very first Taizé european meeting. Then went back to Orléans and started with the house hunting. I went to Paris 2-3 times to visit rooms and appartment but there was not any good result. I was quite desperate at that time because I have to start the internship by 13 of January. Then I was so engaged in writting the two papers for multiculturalism and british pop culture. We also had exams besides. Then it came our very last LAME day, we took picture all together and ate in the canteen together for the last time. :(

Within 2 next days after that, I was hurried to finish my paper, pack my stuff, sell my printer and throw away stuff. I was sick also during that time. Voila, I moved to Paris by friday with one big luggae and one big bag by myself. I stayed for two nights in a friend of mine, and finally got a place to stay bu Sunday. So I moved again by Sunday night. 

Monday was the first day of internship and I was nervous about my french level.  The place in Bobigny was not very nice and safe, so we are all searching for another place. First Sunday, levce and I were cleaning the house and went to Rosny Centre Commercial, which was surprisingly quite nice. Second Sunday, I moved again to another new place because I suddenly get a space in a residence by Friday afternoon.  So here I am now, staying in my new place which is a very nice one and writing what have happened in this month. That's a lot of moving and tons of mixed feelings that I don't even have time to be sad or mad with my situation. 

I don't know how, but I was being most of the time positive with my situation eventhough everything was not very clear at that time. It's Lanty's power, my parents' trust on me together with His blessing that allow me to survive well and be in the right track until now. :)

At some point, I am a bit afraid that maybe the next several months I will be bored with my calm and quite life. Well, there are still 3 days to go for this month. Don't think too much Lanty. Time will pass and you'll enjoy your present life.