L'année du Cheval

Doa tiga Salam Maria

Sekitar bulan Oktober-November tahun lalu, gue sudah hampir memutuskan utk pulang ke Indonesia and magang/kerja disana. Gue begitu ga yakin kalau gue bisa mendapatkan kesempatan magang di Paris, karena level bahasa Prancis gue yang gue rasa ga cukup dan juga pengalaman kerja di bidang yang gue mau sangat minim. Gue uda mulai daftar di perusahaan besar di Jakarta dan KL, dan mulai tanya2 teman ttg lowongan magang di kantor mereka. Bahkan mama papa dengan senang hati menyambut gue kalau gue pulang kapanpun itu.

Tapi suatu hari gue memutuskan bahwa gue akan berusaha sekuat tenaga utk bisa dapat kesempatan magang disini. Kenapa? Pertama, ini kesempatan terakhir gue utk belajar segala hal dari negara ini dan orang2nya. Kedua, gue masih mau membuktikan ke diri gue sendiri, sejauh mana kemampuan gue utk bertahan hidup tanpa 'kembali ke kandang'. Lalu faktor lainnya, gue masih pengen ada di Prancis, gue mau Tommy bisa datang pas summer dan kita bisa jalan2 bareng, gue mau Tommy jg punya kesempatan utk belajar banyak dari negri yang sangat beda dari Indo ini.  Gue masih mau ke London, Spanyol dan Roma juga.  Kalaupun orang2 mulai menyindir gue bahwa gue uda umur 25 tapi masih blm pnya kerjaan tetap, dll., gue meyakinkan diri gue, bahwa gue masih akan punya 100 tahun kedepan, dan 2 tahun hanyalah jangka waktu pendek yang gue habiskan utk belajar banyak hal bagi kepribadian gue kedepannya.

Masa2 ngelamar magang bukan masa yang mudah. Setiap gue mengirim aplikasi, gue jg harus siap ditolak atau diajak interview mendadak pake bahasa prancis. Dapat kesempatan magang disini memang susah, karena semua anak kuliah diwajibkan magang sehingga perusahaan bisa memilih dengan leluasa kandidat mereka. 

So, setelah g memutuskan utk bertahan dinegri ini, gue benar2 berusaha. Gue update cv gue, motivation letter, nongkrongin situs ngelamar magang tiap malem, latihan interview pake bahasa prancis, dan gue ga lupa utk berdoa. 

Gue berkomitmen utk doa tiga Salam Maria karena gue percaya bahwa Allah Bapa melalui Yesus dan Bunda Maria akan mengabulkan permohonan gue. Gue berdoa agar diberi kesempatan magang di Prancis. Tapi gue tetap menutup setiap doa dengan permohonan agar apa yang diberikan kepada gue adalah yang terbaik bagi masa depan gue, baik itu magang disini, maupun kerja di Indo. Gue percaya kalau apapun yang akan diberikan kepada gue, itu adalah jalan yang terbaik bagi gue. Gue jg berjanji bahwa jikalau suatu hari akan ada masa2 sulit dalam masa magang gue di prancis, gue ga akan mengeluh, karena itu adalah pilihan gue. Gue benar2 pasa masa berusaha dan berser. Akhirnya gue mengerti apa maksud kata2 'berusaha dan berserah diri'. 

Permohonan gue dikabulkan oleh bunda Maria. Bahkan gue dapat 2 kesempatan magang dari 2 perusahaan berbeda dan 1 lowongan kerja di Indonesia. Plus, setelah beberapa saat, gue jg uda bisa dapat tempat tinggal pasti di Paris yang super susah utk cari tmp tinggal ini. Gue merasa begitu diberkati dan dipercaya oleh Tuhan utk menjalani hidup gue dengan baik dan sebaik-baiknya agar gak ada penyesalan di masa mendatang. Tuhan begitu baik sama gue dan gue sangat bersyukur karenanya. 

Gue biasanya gak pernah membicarakan tentang iman kepercayaan maupun agama dengan orang lain. Gue adalah pendengar yang baik karena gue merasa gue bisa jadi domba yang baik tapi bukan gembala yang sebenarnya. Gue nulis di blog, yang gada yang baca ini, karena gue mau ketika suatu hari iman gue mulai goyah, gue akan kembali baca blog ini dan mengingat betapa ketika gue percaya, berusaha dan berserah, maka engkau akan diberikan yang terbaik. 

Jika memang suatu hari kamu tanpa sengaja membaca blog ini, gue harap ini bisa jadi sedikit bantuan bagimu agar kiranya kamu makin percaya akan kekuatan doa tiga Salam Maria dan kepada Allah Bapa. 

Terima kasih Bunda atas terkabulnya doa tiga Salam Maria. Aku percaya bahwa setiap moment di dalam hidupku, adalah alasan di balik lapisan imanku.

Je vous salue Marie, pleine de grâce

Le Seigneur est avec vous

Vous êtes bénie entre toutes les femmes

Et Jesus, le fruit des vos entrailles, est béni

Sainte Marie, mère du Dieu

Priez pour nous, pauvres pêcheurs

Maintenant et à l'heure de notre mort

Amen 

Unexpectable January

WOW. I am also surprised at how many things have happened in this month. By new year, i was still in Strasbourg, enjoying the very first Taizé european meeting. Then went back to Orléans and started with the house hunting. I went to Paris 2-3 times to visit rooms and appartment but there was not any good result. I was quite desperate at that time because I have to start the internship by 13 of January. Then I was so engaged in writting the two papers for multiculturalism and british pop culture. We also had exams besides. Then it came our very last LAME day, we took picture all together and ate in the canteen together for the last time. :(

Within 2 next days after that, I was hurried to finish my paper, pack my stuff, sell my printer and throw away stuff. I was sick also during that time. Voila, I moved to Paris by friday with one big luggae and one big bag by myself. I stayed for two nights in a friend of mine, and finally got a place to stay bu Sunday. So I moved again by Sunday night. 

Monday was the first day of internship and I was nervous about my french level.  The place in Bobigny was not very nice and safe, so we are all searching for another place. First Sunday, levce and I were cleaning the house and went to Rosny Centre Commercial, which was surprisingly quite nice. Second Sunday, I moved again to another new place because I suddenly get a space in a residence by Friday afternoon.  So here I am now, staying in my new place which is a very nice one and writing what have happened in this month. That's a lot of moving and tons of mixed feelings that I don't even have time to be sad or mad with my situation. 

I don't know how, but I was being most of the time positive with my situation eventhough everything was not very clear at that time. It's Lanty's power, my parents' trust on me together with His blessing that allow me to survive well and be in the right track until now. :)

At some point, I am a bit afraid that maybe the next several months I will be bored with my calm and quite life. Well, there are still 3 days to go for this month. Don't think too much Lanty. Time will pass and you'll enjoy your present life.

the guy in the metro

I always take Metro 1 departing from La Defense to go home from work. Since La Defense is a business area, there are many young, well-dressed, serious people taking this metro everyday. Besides, they are also good looking (typical french style) and quite smell good (with an intense smell of parfum). :D

So, today I saw one of the most good-looking and my-type western guy. I saw this good looking one in the metro, and he looks like a very cool young french businessman. He was also well-behaved and , I guess, well-educated.well, it was my spontaneous judgement from how he acted during the busy hour in metro and also to other passangers.  Hahaha... so, eventhough I had to stand in the metro full with people, it was fine, at least there is a very nice view to be enjoyed along the journey.

Now I know, all the handsome french guys are living in Paris and working in La Defense. The good thing is my office is at the same direction. Lucky me!

Today on the way home, I was thinking that I start enjoying my life in this big city. I love smaller city like Orléans, but still, capital city is always interesting for me. Eventhough I have to squeeze myself into the metro, climb so many stairs to change the metro line, take the bus, face the cold weather, etc., but still, after I figure out how everything works here, all is fine for me. Yeah, you will spend (much) more time in the public transportation, everything is more pricey, things are more competitive, and being individualist is the only choice left, but at the same time, you also can enjoy the other side of it. There are more choices available, from education, food, entertainment, etc.  Personally, I always want to challenge myself to survive in the capital city. As Indonesian phrase says "ibukota lebih kejam dari ibu tiri", it is true somehow, but it is also one of the reason that interest me to prove to myself that I can survive here. It is to once again to prove that I am growing up and I can solve everything by myself, especially in the big city where nobody is helping you.  There will come a time, at the end, when I have been successfully survive in the capital city, and that feeling is the best ever.  Survive does not mean only living and visiting the city for me. It is when you I feel comfortable of doing things here, be in the know-how stage for my personal issues, earn some money and living for a longer period, travel around the city without fear of being lost, be comfortable to go where without being skeptical (because I know how to solve it if things go wrong). Jakarta was my first city and maintenant je suis en train de le faire ici, à la capitale du monde, Paris. 

xxx of 2013

Couleur : violet

Repas : le fromage et le baguette

Boisson : cidre

Livre : Totochan

Moment : Le pâque au Sicile et à la maison

Lieu : Orléans et Lampung

Personne : mes familles

Joy : rester à Taizé

Douleur : être seule

La Percée: français et stage en France

Tristesse : la maison, elle me manque bcp

Regret : plin plan, être très stresse

Cadeau : voyager  ( Paris, Marseille, Nice, Lyon, Tours, Monaco, Sicile, Amsterdam, La Haye, Bruxelles, Berlin, Kassel, Witzenhausen, Frankfurt, Budapest, Vienne, Praha, Jakarta, Lampung, Hong Kong, Jeddah, Riyadh, Strasbourg, Kohl)

Knowing myself better: found out that i love long flight

Valeur : être plus brave, aventurons

Réflexion : Visiter le lieu n'est pas plus important que la personne tu voyages avec.

Motto : la vie est imprévue, non? T'inquiète pas.

The first week at BR

The first week of my internship at BR has passed. I was nervous at the beginning, but now I think I am fine. For the first three days I was in Suresnes office, met new people, got headache with all french conversation with its new vocabularies and different accent of many people, and also we had one-day tour around the office, laboratory, warehouse, etc. I also went to the visa agency office for office matters, to the Bourse du commerce near Louvre and had 2-day training in the Champs-Elysees office. It was a bit weird for me because normally I go to Louvre or Champs-Elysees as a tourist, but now I am there for working. 

Eventhough it is a new place, but I can control myself and my feeling a lot better. I know how to make myself comfortable there, and I do not really care about what others may think about me, about my weird accent in speaking french, or even about my bad french level. So far I understand most of the things well and I can do the job easily.  The training in Champs-Elysees was very confusing and hard for me, because they are all talking and discussing something at the same time.  Can yiu imagine, 3-5 women speak french at the same time about the beauty products and its facial and massage techniques and methodologies? It was hard.  But it passed anw. At least, I can enjoy the lunch at a good French restaurant and also eat Sushi during the 2-day training.  

I know that next week is gonna be tought because I will really work, and they expect me to learn everything quickly. I will, again, struggle about my decision to do the internship there if days are getting harder, but I am trying not to think about it. I will learn as much as I can absorb, and one day everything will be paid off. Profites-en!

pilgrimage of trust on earth

I'm one of the luckiest in the world to have the chance to join the event with another 30,000 pilgrims. To really experience the pilgrimage of trust on earth among people.  It was something I had never experienced before, and finally I can get the chance to fulfill another dream in life. 

 

L.A.M.E 2012-2014

These photos were taken on the 8 January 2014, the last day we gathered together for the Computing and the European Accounting Systems Exams.  I don't know what everyone is up to now, but I really wish them all have a good time now and in the future. When we took the picture, somebody was saying 'looking-at-the-bright future' face. =)

This also remarks my time of being a 'real'student which has finished.  Doing an internship is really different from being a student. At the end, I was happy for the study I did, the great people I met, the nice time I had, the good atmosphere among us, and I will bring all these good memories with me, always.
Ils me manque!

Bonne année 2014

So I enjoyed the new year in a very different way this time. We had the vigile prayer until 12p.m in the Eglise St. Thomas, Strasbourg. I was half sleeping during the prayer. Until somebody says 'happy new year'! And I was awake and we started to say happy new year to many people. Then we had the festival of nations in the cafeteria and it was fun! We danced the Polish dance, we sang, we laughed, we drank the French traditional beverages, etc.

I have had a very up-down and amazing year last year. And now I'm ready to welcome the new year. I have some resolutions to achieve this year:
- finish my internship and graduate from the master
- go to London with my beloved brother
- find a job that I have passion at
- settle down and be with someone I'm in love with
And the most highlighted one, live my life to the fullest and enjoy every moment! Nothing will happen twice.

So welcome 2014! Be nice, be great, be unpredictable, be amazing, be crazy, be surprising, be the best you can offer to me.

P.s.: Mele has found a job! So happy for her.

Sans domicile fixe

Wow, it's 12 January 2014 already!!!

I don't know where time has been flying since last December.
There has been numerous things in my life. I have finished all my exams for this master study. I went to Strasbourg for the Taizé meeting, which was amazing, and met so many great people there. I was so stressed for several days because I couldn't find a place to stay for my internship. Then I started to send random msg to Indonesian couch surfers in Paris, and I was amazed at how people can be really nice. One of them replied saying he couldn't help, another texted me asking if I might have already find a solution, and another girl texted me saying that she could host me for several days if I want to. I was very amazed that there are really people, who I never know before, are eager to respond to my random and silly message asking for a place to stay and offer me the place. At the end, I stayed in SH's place for 2 night, and now I finally have a place, our new castle in bobigny, with Levka and Sanja.

I have been very busy finding place to stay. I went to Paris couple of time to see the apartment, room, etc.  We actually found a very nice one, but the owner didn't want to rent it to see because she doesn't believe that we, 3 young foreigner students, can pay they rent without problem. I couldn't accept this. Why she couldn't be more open minded. A foreign student studying in another country must prove that she has enough money to live in order to have the student visa. How could she underestimate us like that.

From all things that happen to me lately, and also the experience I had during Taizé meeting, it showed me a really two different things in life. How some people can trust you and offer you help, and the other are being very suspicious about everything and everyone. It really depends on you what kind of person you wanna be.

This week was a very tough time, because I had to finished the 2 essays, then exam, finding new place in Paris, move out from residence and Orléans and to say goodbye to my classmates.  I really experience the moment when I really had no idea where to stay in several days, and with no one to lean on. It was a very precious lesson of life for me and also a reminder to myself to be grateful that I have so many fixed place to stay with my families in Indonesia.  But I have to mention that at that time, I was worried but at the same time, I was also relaxed and I was really sure that I would find a place just in time. I do believe in God and that He takes care of me as long as I make efforts. I was also surprised of how I could be like that in such situation. I think I really learn about 'trusting God' and about the phrase 'worry about nothing as you past has been written and you future is in His hand'.

I was also sad to know that all of our LAME friends will never gather together again, as many of us might be in some different countries, but this is life, and I know that every meeting will end. I have created the best time of it and I'll live with its good memories.

Orléans has become one of my comfort zones. I know where to go, who to meet, what to do, etc.  That's why I have to leave the place and start over in another place and learn to survive in the new place. So now I'm starting my new life in Paris, a city that everyone adores, which is actually as complicated as Jakarta, or even more. Tomorrow is my first day of internship. I hope it will go well and 6 months will be just like a click. Bonne chance à moi!

le 159